 |
|
|
|
|
Mentoring (Part II): How to Make the Most of the Relationship
Contributed by Martin E. Murphy, CPCU, SVP of The Jacobson Group and Barbara Taylor and Jane Lowenstein of Janbara & Associates
Congratulations - You have officially become a mentor. You've accepted the responsibility and time commitment required for a positive mentorship experience. Your mentee has scheduled your first official meeting. So now what do you do?
The first meeting
The first meeting between mentee and mentor is your opportunity to build rapport with one another. Establish a few ground rules about how you will work together in the future. Additionally, discuss what you each hope to achieve from the relationship.
A few topics to discuss:
- Specific goals that you would both like to achieve
- Expectations for the relationship
- The contributions and commitment you must make for the relationship
- How you would like to handle contact between meetings
- How you will achieve an open and honest level of discussion
- Agreement around confidentiality
- Possible dates and places to hold future meetings
- Have an understanding of when you know the relationship is "over"
How can the mentor ensure that the mentee benefits from the relationship?
The mentor should practice active listening in the meetings. This can be done by paying attention to non-verbal messages, using examples of behavior to illustrate a concept or process, reflecting and summarizing. Additionally, the mentor should be patient and sensitive, yet tough and direct. The mentor should offer emotional support by sharing personal insight and experience. Furthermore, the mentor should help mentees understand feedback, as well as make practical and creative recommendations for change. Ask a lot of probing questions - part of your job is to help mentees see what they have not yet seen for themselves!
The GROW model
The GROW (Goals, Reality, Options, Will) model encourages mentees to reveal what their goals are, where they are now, how they could move forward and what they will commit to doing to reach those goals.
Goals: Help the mentee identify the problem and what he or she wants to do about it. These questions should encourage him or her to reach a SMART (Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic and Time-bound) goal.
Reality: Understand/establish the current situation. Ask questions that help the mentee become aware of the situation such as where are you now; what obstacles are in your way; what have you done about it so far; and what were the results?
Options: What could you do? Encourage them to come up with a range of feasible, realistic options for reaching their goals. Use "What if" questions to help generate as many alternative courses of action as possible. Evaluate the cost and benefits.
Will: What will you do? Encourage the mentee to make things happen and commit to acting upon his or her chosen solution.
What can mentees do to make sure they get the most out of the relationship?
The mentee should make a conscious effort to be honest, focused and open to advice. The mentee must be comfortable hearing things that might be hard to hear and also must be willing to apply the new knowledge and advice to his or her career. He or she must be open to change and growth. The mentee must play a proactive role in scheduling meetings, making him or herself available, and being responsible for the progress made through the relationship.
Remember that the benefits of a mentorship are correlated with the energy and commitment you put into it. If approached the right way, a mentorship can be one of the best tools for career and personal development and growth.
|
|
|
|
|
|
